Marketing setup. Done once. Done right.
Built for the business owner who just needs it done right the first time.
You know what you need. You just need someone to build it properly so you can take over and run it yourself. No retainers. No hand-holding. No 12-month contracts. Pay once, own it forever, and never think about the setup again.
5–7
Day Turnaround
$0
Retainers
0
Discovery Calls
100%
Yours Forever
Who this is for
This is for you if:
- ✓You are running the business yourself and wearing every hat
- ✓You know you need Google Ads or a real website or email automation but the setup feels like a wall
- ✓You have been quoted retainer prices that made you laugh out loud
- ✓You want to own your marketing and actually understand it, not rent it from someone who gatekeeps the login
You've been quoted $5K/mo for a 12-month contract to do what we'll set up in a week.
Marketing agencies are bloated. They sell process and time. We sell finished work. Pick a channel. Pay once. Get the credentials. We leave. The end.
The Process
Pick. Submit. Done in a week.
Pick your channel
Six setups plus Burnrate. No bundle nonsense. Buy what you need. Skip what you don't.
Fill out your intake
Short form. No discovery call. No kickoff workshop. Submit and you're done.
We build it in 5 to 7 days
You get the work, the credentials, and the receipts. Then we leave. You own it forever.
What we set up
Six setups. Pick yours.
Plus Burnrate, the only recurring product we sell.
Website Build
A real website that loads fast, looks sharp, and actually shows up on Google.
from $179
Get startedPaid Social Playbook
A custom Meta playbook built around your exact customer, offer, and market.
from $59
Get startedSEM / Google Ads
+ Optional 90-day sprintGoogle Ads that bring in calls instead of just spending your budget.
from $149+ $99/mo, 90-day sprint (optional)
Get startedAnalytics & Tracking
+ Optional 90-day sprintKnow which ads are making you money and which ones are just costing you money.
from $99+ $49/mo, 90-day sprint (optional)
Get startedEmail / Lifecycle
+ Optional 90-day sprintA welcome sequence that converts leads while you sleep.
from $99+ $49/mo, 90-day sprint (optional)
Get startedAutomation
Custom QuoteTell us what is eating your time. We will make it stop.
from $79
Get a quoteFrom people who stopped renting
They paid once. They own it now.
I had been quoted $3,800 a month by two different marketing agencies for Google Ads. Loud Llamas set up the whole thing for $249 and it was running in five days. Three months later it is still the only ad account I have that actually makes sense to me.
Sarah K.
Residential cleaning company
The analytics setup alone was worth it. I finally know which campaigns are driving calls and which ones I was just burning money on. Took them less than a week.
Marcus T.
HVAC and plumbing
Burnrate caught $340 in monthly waste in the first report. Paid for itself in the first week.
Jenna R.
Online fitness coaching
Your paid ads are
bleeding money.
You can't see where.
Most small businesses are flushing $300 to $800 a month on ads that go nowhere. Wrong keywords. Duplicate spend. Paying for clicks you already earn for free. Burnrate finds exactly where the money is going and hands you a plain-English fix list every week. Not a dashboard full of graphs. A list that says: stop spending here, shift budget here, this keyword is bleeding you.
Marketing agencies charge $2,000 a month to do what Burnrate does automatically overnight. The difference is Burnrate actually shows you the problem in plain English instead of hiding it in a slide deck.
Founder spots
Filling fast
86
/ 100 spots taken
Only 14 founder spots left. After that, $29/mo standard pricing. No exceptions.
The Founder Deal
First 100 clients.
50% off everything.
Half off any setup. Burnrate locked at $17.99/mo forever. We're building the proof that this model works. You get the discount for being early.
Setup discount
50% off
Any one-time setup. Stack as many as you want. Code applies at checkout.
See packages →Burnrate · Founder
$17.99/mo
Locked forever. No price increases. Ever.
Founder spots
Filling fast
86
/ 100 spots taken
Meta won't let agencies properly access your ad account. Period. So instead of pretending we can do something we can't, we built the Paid Social Playbook. A custom roadmap built around your ICP and your offer. You run the ads. We built the plan.
Get the playbook from $59 →
Got questions
FAQ
Not really. The configurator handles it. If you're stuck on something, check the box. Let The Llamas Decide.
5 to 7 business days standard. Burnrate's first report lands in 24 hours.
Flat $79 troubleshooting fee. No retainer. No drama.
Optional 90-day sprint on SEM, Analytics, and Email if you want a hand on the wheel while you find your footing. Auto-cancels at day 90. No renewal. No pressure. Burnrate is the one true recurring product. Everything else is one-time.
Meta makes it nearly impossible for third parties to configure ad accounts on behalf of clients. We're not going to pretend otherwise. So we built something better. A custom playbook around your ICP and your offer. You run it. We built the roadmap.
A SaaS that connects your Google Ads and Meta accounts, runs weekly waste detection, and hands you a prioritized fix list. $29/mo. Founders pay $17.99/mo locked forever. First 100 only.
Please do. It feeds the llamas. Each setup is its own sprint. They run in parallel.
Stop renting your
marketing.
Buy it instead.
Pick a channel. Pay once. Done in 5 to 7 days.